For much of spring, New York City bars, restaurants, and other public gathering spots remained empty of patrons as New Yorkers adhered to the strict social distancing mandate that helped flatten the curve of COVID-19. But, as the city moves through its phased reopening and people expand their social circle, is it safe to have in-person dates again?
Lina Miyakawa, MD, Assistant Professor, Medicine (Pulmonary, Critical Care, and Sleep Medicine) at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai, explains how to seek intimacy while protecting yourself and any partners from COVID-19.
New York City is slowly reopening. As we enter a “new normal” with COVID-19 as a persistent threat, is it safe to re-enter the dating world?
I strongly agree with the recommendations from the U.S. Centers of Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) the World Health Organization to wear masks, socially distance, and practice hand hygiene. While I remain optimistic that our world will thrive again, this pandemic is far from over and another surge is a very real possibility.
If you are thinking about dating, you should consider the risks of any interaction and weigh the risk of possibly infecting yourself or a loved one. These are not easy decisions to make. But we can use this time for self-development as well as to build new skills of communication and intimacy.
Also, it is important to remember that COVID-19 recommendations continue to be updated as we learn more about the disease. Everyone should stay up to date with safety recommendations issued by their state and locality.
If you have decided to have in-person dates, when is it appropriate to have non-masked interactions?
There are currently no guidelines to inform us on how to transition from masked to non-masked interactions. However, it is important to note that mask wearing is based on a risk profile—low, medium, and high. For example, low risk would be walking alone through a secluded section of Prospect Park; medium risk would be strolling along Orchard Beach with a friend; and high risk would be boarding a crowded 7 train. The transition from masked to non-masked interactions should also be based on a risk profile.
To assess your partner’s risk profile, you can ask them these questions:
- How many contacts do you have on a daily basis?
- Who do you live with?
- Do you leave the house? If so, where do you go?
- Do you follow the recommendations to mitigate the risk of exposure, like wearing a mask and practicing social distancing?
- Do you work in situations with high exposure risk?
Also, don’t forget considering your own risk profile. Do you have an at-risk contact (such as a grandparent or a friend with chronic medical problems) who you see regularly?
Is the virus spread through sex?
Although COVID-19 has been detected in semen and feces, currently we do not think that the virus is spread through the sexual act. But, given that the virus is spread through respiratory droplets—which are much more likely to be shared when in close contact with another person—many sexual acts will be considered high risk. So, as the New York City Department of Health details in its safer sex and COVID-19 fact sheet, minimizing risks by exploring other avenues of meaningful interaction is suggested and recommended.
What should you look for after being intimate with someone new?
After a close, high-risk encounter like sex, you should be mindful of your personal risk of contracting and falling ill to COVID-19 as well as the risk you may pose to those in your own circle. I recommend monitoring yourself closely for any symptoms of COVID-19 (fever, shortness of breath, cough, fatigue, the loss of taste and smell). Also, consider getting a COVID-19 test five to seven days after the interaction. I would also refrain from interacting with any at-risk persons within a 14 day period after the encounter. If you cannot avoid contact with a high-risk individual, take precautions to lower your risk profile by social distancing, choosing to interact with the individual in outdoor spaces as opposed to indoor spaces, and wearing a mask.
What do you tell patients who are frustrated with quarantine and eager to expand their social circle again?
I recognize that it’s not easy to practice social distancing and I acknowledge that human connection and touch is important.
However, just as it is common courtesy to step aside to create space for someone to walk by, you should wear a mask to protect others—as you may be an asymptomatic carrier. And, prior to opening up your circle, you should carefully consider your risk profile and that of your potential partner.
We are all linked in this global fight against COVID-19 and we have to look out for each other to stay safe. The most dangerous illusion you can have during a pandemic is that it’s only happening to other people, someplace else.